Saturday, August 28, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
heart VS mind
in a single city, we might never think how many people who might got no chance to express or their feelings while others just missed their chance. when we share about this to our closest person such as bestfriend or maybe some strangers, the most feelings that commonly come are sorry for that or blame on us. but apart from that, these people we talk with may not realize that we have different level of power, will or maybe strength.
being under this kind of circumstances we always only have to options. to express or not to express. to hold or not to hold back the feelings. most people afraid of being rejected, and the reason is simple. it hurt.
when we fall in love, people have different reaction to it. some may accept it and blinded by it while the others might denied it and make themselves blind from it.
being an almost 22 woman which struggle with her own heart and mind may sounds like a 13 years old who faced her first love. but i guess no matter how old you are, struggle between your mind and your heart will always happen. in my case, the struggle happens between my curiosity to know the feeling someone that i (should i say) fall for (rather than the L word as i feel its a strong word) with my fear of anything might go wrong and become so awkward after. but when will the question be answer?
there is one time when i think about asking some random question about myself and see how he responds and his answer, but in the end it doesn't solve the problem. it went well for the first question, but when it comes to the second and third, every single question i can think of sounds so obvious that i desperately drowning in my own curiosity.
so, i start to think something else to make myself relief for the time being until the answer of my curiosity and the to see the winner of this match between heart VS mind. i guess what old people say we need to believe in it sometimes even though we live in 21st century. what they so called 'silence if gold' or 'what you get is what you pay' may seems right when it faced with a struggling feeling between our self. and that is what i choose to to face 'now' condition and to gain 'future' situation.
being under this kind of circumstances we always only have to options. to express or not to express. to hold or not to hold back the feelings. most people afraid of being rejected, and the reason is simple. it hurt.
when we fall in love, people have different reaction to it. some may accept it and blinded by it while the others might denied it and make themselves blind from it.
being an almost 22 woman which struggle with her own heart and mind may sounds like a 13 years old who faced her first love. but i guess no matter how old you are, struggle between your mind and your heart will always happen. in my case, the struggle happens between my curiosity to know the feeling someone that i (should i say) fall for (rather than the L word as i feel its a strong word) with my fear of anything might go wrong and become so awkward after. but when will the question be answer?
there is one time when i think about asking some random question about myself and see how he responds and his answer, but in the end it doesn't solve the problem. it went well for the first question, but when it comes to the second and third, every single question i can think of sounds so obvious that i desperately drowning in my own curiosity.
so, i start to think something else to make myself relief for the time being until the answer of my curiosity and the to see the winner of this match between heart VS mind. i guess what old people say we need to believe in it sometimes even though we live in 21st century. what they so called 'silence if gold' or 'what you get is what you pay' may seems right when it faced with a struggling feeling between our self. and that is what i choose to to face 'now' condition and to gain 'future' situation.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
findings identity equals to finding true love?
it may sounds cliche and common. this questions often pops out in most of drama movie which tells about love. the one which made it pops out of my head is when Carrie Bradshaw from sex and the city wrote about true love.
most girl will questioning and dreaming about their true love or maybe soulmate in their teens age, but when you're 25 or when you just days away from become 22 and your sister married when she was 22 and got 2 kids when she is 25, you will start to questioning again when will this true 'soulmate' love. well, this is what happen to me. even though i'm not thinking about marriage, which is its still way too far from what im thinking, i just questioning when will this true 'soulmate' love searching will end?
one fact that quite disturbing. Paris which known by many people or all people around the globe as the most romantic city, some might say as love city is the city which have the highest number of single in Europe. does that mean its even harder for us?
i started to think and realize that searching for our identity might have connection with searching for our true 'soulamate' love.
most girl will questioning and dreaming about their true love or maybe soulmate in their teens age, but when you're 25 or when you just days away from become 22 and your sister married when she was 22 and got 2 kids when she is 25, you will start to questioning again when will this true 'soulmate' love. well, this is what happen to me. even though i'm not thinking about marriage, which is its still way too far from what im thinking, i just questioning when will this true 'soulmate' love searching will end?
one fact that quite disturbing. Paris which known by many people or all people around the globe as the most romantic city, some might say as love city is the city which have the highest number of single in Europe. does that mean its even harder for us?
i started to think and realize that searching for our identity might have connection with searching for our true 'soulamate' love.
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
tang ting tung...
bahaya niy!! bahaya!!
bahaya facebook semakin meraja lela...selain ketagihan ma facebook, kuis2 di facebook membuat gila n ketagihan, huahhaha....
emank niy facebook, bahaya bgt!! kayaknya semakin susah aja niy menahan godaan buat ga buka facebook...padahal siy kuisnya juga ga mutu2 amat, malah suka ngaco abis
tapi mah, kitanya tetep aja ikutan tuh kuis2 ga jelas...
eniwei, ngomong2 ttg hal yg membuat kita gila n ketagihan, jd inget klo menggila karna seseorang, huahahhaha...apa sech!!
aduh...mengapa dikau tiba2 muncul ditengah2 keramaian??!!
bahaya facebook semakin meraja lela...selain ketagihan ma facebook, kuis2 di facebook membuat gila n ketagihan, huahhaha....
emank niy facebook, bahaya bgt!! kayaknya semakin susah aja niy menahan godaan buat ga buka facebook...padahal siy kuisnya juga ga mutu2 amat, malah suka ngaco abis
tapi mah, kitanya tetep aja ikutan tuh kuis2 ga jelas...
eniwei, ngomong2 ttg hal yg membuat kita gila n ketagihan, jd inget klo menggila karna seseorang, huahahhaha...apa sech!!
aduh...mengapa dikau tiba2 muncul ditengah2 keramaian??!!
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
fall into my love....
Well, it's not that i'm just losin' ground
I just might have tried to get around
Well i feel so clever
When we are together
Now you stole my words, you stole my love
Like a shining moon up in the sky
Everybody's got a place to hide
Well, I'm feelin' better
Now that you're with me
Oh, it will be fine together,
Fall into my love
Fall into my love, baby...
I'm just gonna give you a dressing down
If you take my love and let it die
'cause i feel so clever
When we're together
Now you stole my words, you stole my love
Now you've got to tell me you know it's love
And by what they say there must be more
When i see your face all i see
Is just the scar that love has left
We'll be feeling so much better,
Fall into my love
Fall into my love, baby...
Don't you know
I never found myself
Let me tell you i've been waiting
Something i, will find
Just to please you, something special
Fall into my love, baby...
huhuhu.....can someone send me this song, love it so much!! fall into my love---black box
maybe then i can fall to someone love, huahahhahaha....
I just might have tried to get around
Well i feel so clever
When we are together
Now you stole my words, you stole my love
Like a shining moon up in the sky
Everybody's got a place to hide
Well, I'm feelin' better
Now that you're with me
Oh, it will be fine together,
Fall into my love
Fall into my love, baby...
I'm just gonna give you a dressing down
If you take my love and let it die
'cause i feel so clever
When we're together
Now you stole my words, you stole my love
Now you've got to tell me you know it's love
And by what they say there must be more
When i see your face all i see
Is just the scar that love has left
We'll be feeling so much better,
Fall into my love
Fall into my love, baby...
Don't you know
I never found myself
Let me tell you i've been waiting
Something i, will find
Just to please you, something special
Fall into my love, baby...
huhuhu.....can someone send me this song, love it so much!! fall into my love---black box
maybe then i can fall to someone love, huahahhahaha....
Monday, April 6, 2009
true love life
hidup sendiri itu emank ada enaknya tapi ada ga enaknya juga...
enaknya, kita punya full privacy terhadap hidup kita
tapi, selalu ada bagian dari diri kita yang membutuhkan seseorang buat berbagi, buat cerita, buat berkeluh kesah....
sama kaya apa yg gw rasain skarang, kadang kita ngerasa pusing n butuh waktu buat sendiri di waktu orang2 ada disekitar kita, tapi kadang ngerasa sepi, ampe bingung mau ngapain, pengen ngomong, tapi masa ngomong ma tembok...
tadi gw abis chatting ma temen/sahabat dari sejak sd yg sempet ilang kontak karna gw skolah di sma terpencil yg memenjarakan siswa siswinya. intinya pas kita ketemu lg di FB, langsung deh nostalgiaan. trus td gw ma dia ngomongin ttg suatu relationship, intinya dia ngiri ma temen gw yg udah tunangan.
klo dipikir2 emank iya....enak ya, udah pasti, ga usah pusing2 nyari seseorang...
sobat gw ini emank udah punya pacar, tp realistis aja deh...ga mungkin juga tiba2 minta tunangan, emang maen2....
duwh,,,ko gw terkesan kaya desperate jomblowers siy...intinya siy gw, jd inget lagi kisah kakek nenek yg gandengan itu...(klo lupa coba liat post bulan maret)
ada ga ya cinta sejati buat gw? huehehe....
enaknya, kita punya full privacy terhadap hidup kita
tapi, selalu ada bagian dari diri kita yang membutuhkan seseorang buat berbagi, buat cerita, buat berkeluh kesah....
sama kaya apa yg gw rasain skarang, kadang kita ngerasa pusing n butuh waktu buat sendiri di waktu orang2 ada disekitar kita, tapi kadang ngerasa sepi, ampe bingung mau ngapain, pengen ngomong, tapi masa ngomong ma tembok...
tadi gw abis chatting ma temen/sahabat dari sejak sd yg sempet ilang kontak karna gw skolah di sma terpencil yg memenjarakan siswa siswinya. intinya pas kita ketemu lg di FB, langsung deh nostalgiaan. trus td gw ma dia ngomongin ttg suatu relationship, intinya dia ngiri ma temen gw yg udah tunangan.
klo dipikir2 emank iya....enak ya, udah pasti, ga usah pusing2 nyari seseorang...
sobat gw ini emank udah punya pacar, tp realistis aja deh...ga mungkin juga tiba2 minta tunangan, emang maen2....
duwh,,,ko gw terkesan kaya desperate jomblowers siy...intinya siy gw, jd inget lagi kisah kakek nenek yg gandengan itu...(klo lupa coba liat post bulan maret)
ada ga ya cinta sejati buat gw? huehehe....
Saturday, April 4, 2009
HA HA HI HI
wah...after few days ga nulis, jd bingung mu nulis apa niy...
sbenernya siy ga ada ada crita yg ok buat diceritain...
but, after all 2 minggu bersama cumi2 sudah berakhir...itu semua diakhiri sama dinner di makansutra esplanade with the other classmates...
abis itu, gw, nia(my housemate), iwan (nia's BF), and manda(iwan's friend) jalan bareng aja...
eniwei, yg namanya manda itu cowo ya...(just to avoid miss understanding aja, masalahnya menyangkut identitas seseorang niy, hehe)
kaya nganter turis aja, gw n nia nganter para cowo2 ini ke merlion, iseng2 mu foto2 aja...
(the photos will upload in a few days)
berhubung udara singapore yg lembab, panas, dan tidak bersahabat, tujuan selanjutnya kita tempuh melalui jalan air...(bahasanya udh kacau) naiklah kita taxi boat sampe clarke quay
untung aja ada si manda, klo ga gw harus menghadapi siksa friday night!! as i mention before, nia ma iwan kan couple, jd ga ok banget klo tb2 ada gw sendiri gt jd sapi melongo di tengah2 mreka, meskipun emank gw juga udah kenal ma iwan, tp kan tetep aja ga enak!!!
so, kok jd kaya double date ya?? padahal kan mu ketemu temennya nia yg lainnya, yaitu 2 org cewe, febry and puput...
eniwei, emank dasar perut ga bisa diajak kompromi, hari pertama 'tamu' para kaum cewe, walhasil bolak balik aja ke toilet, ah....ribet bgt deh emank...
ditambah rasa2 mual kaya pengen hoekx!! kayaknya gara2 sate yg tadi dimakan pas acara ma si cumi2 itu deh...huff...untungnya siy teratasi setelah minum red bull (lho??)
akhirnya gw chill out aja deh ampe jam .... (jam brapa ya??) klo ga salah siy jam 1
oiya, slama chill di the clinic, udah ada 2 psk aja yg tawar menawar ma bule2 jablay, hiiii....
tp cuma 1 yg berhasil merayu di bule jablay...(ternyata tebakan nia bener!!) abis proses tawar menawar, si bule ke atm yg ga jauh dari tempat nego, ngambil duit buay bayar si 'ehem-ehem' kali....(y oloh, kepo bgt ya gw)
yah...at least jadikan itu semua sebagai pengalaman menarik, hehe....
ps: judulnya aja suka2 niy blog, jd ya suka2 yg publish deh...
peaches n cream
sbenernya siy ga ada ada crita yg ok buat diceritain...
but, after all 2 minggu bersama cumi2 sudah berakhir...itu semua diakhiri sama dinner di makansutra esplanade with the other classmates...
abis itu, gw, nia(my housemate), iwan (nia's BF), and manda(iwan's friend) jalan bareng aja...
eniwei, yg namanya manda itu cowo ya...(just to avoid miss understanding aja, masalahnya menyangkut identitas seseorang niy, hehe)
kaya nganter turis aja, gw n nia nganter para cowo2 ini ke merlion, iseng2 mu foto2 aja...
(the photos will upload in a few days)
berhubung udara singapore yg lembab, panas, dan tidak bersahabat, tujuan selanjutnya kita tempuh melalui jalan air...(bahasanya udh kacau) naiklah kita taxi boat sampe clarke quay
untung aja ada si manda, klo ga gw harus menghadapi siksa friday night!! as i mention before, nia ma iwan kan couple, jd ga ok banget klo tb2 ada gw sendiri gt jd sapi melongo di tengah2 mreka, meskipun emank gw juga udah kenal ma iwan, tp kan tetep aja ga enak!!!
so, kok jd kaya double date ya?? padahal kan mu ketemu temennya nia yg lainnya, yaitu 2 org cewe, febry and puput...
eniwei, emank dasar perut ga bisa diajak kompromi, hari pertama 'tamu' para kaum cewe, walhasil bolak balik aja ke toilet, ah....ribet bgt deh emank...
ditambah rasa2 mual kaya pengen hoekx!! kayaknya gara2 sate yg tadi dimakan pas acara ma si cumi2 itu deh...huff...untungnya siy teratasi setelah minum red bull (lho??)
akhirnya gw chill out aja deh ampe jam .... (jam brapa ya??) klo ga salah siy jam 1
oiya, slama chill di the clinic, udah ada 2 psk aja yg tawar menawar ma bule2 jablay, hiiii....
tp cuma 1 yg berhasil merayu di bule jablay...(ternyata tebakan nia bener!!) abis proses tawar menawar, si bule ke atm yg ga jauh dari tempat nego, ngambil duit buay bayar si 'ehem-ehem' kali....(y oloh, kepo bgt ya gw)
yah...at least jadikan itu semua sebagai pengalaman menarik, hehe....
ps: judulnya aja suka2 niy blog, jd ya suka2 yg publish deh...
peaches n cream
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