Thursday, August 26, 2010

heart VS mind

in a single city, we might never think how many people who might got no chance to express or their feelings while others just missed their chance. when we share about this to our closest person such as bestfriend or maybe some strangers, the most feelings that commonly come are sorry for that or blame on us. but apart from that, these people we talk with may not realize that we have different level of power, will or maybe strength.

being under this kind of circumstances we always only have to options. to express or not to express. to hold or not to hold back the feelings. most people afraid of being rejected, and the reason is simple. it hurt.

when we fall in love, people have different reaction to it. some may accept it and blinded by it while the others might denied it and make themselves blind from it.

being an almost 22 woman which struggle with her own heart and mind may sounds like a 13 years old  who faced her first love. but i guess no matter how old you are, struggle between your mind and your heart will always happen. in my case, the struggle happens between my curiosity to know the feeling someone that i (should i say) fall for (rather than the L word as i feel its a strong word) with my fear of anything might go wrong and become so awkward after. but when will the question be answer?

there is one time when i think about asking some random question about myself and see how he responds and his answer, but in the end it doesn't solve the problem. it went well for the first question, but when it comes to the second and third, every single question i can think of sounds so obvious that i desperately drowning in my own curiosity.

so, i start to think something else to make myself relief for the time being until the answer of my curiosity and the to see the winner of this match between heart VS mind. i guess what old people say we need to believe in it sometimes even though we live in 21st century. what they so called 'silence if gold' or 'what you get is what you pay' may seems right when it faced with a struggling feeling between our self. and that is what i choose to to face 'now' condition and to gain 'future' situation.

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